Crisis of Confidence: A Poem

by | Original Poetry, The Poetry Deck | 5 comments

Crisis of Confidence

In the moonlight
jack-knife shadow against the wall
I sat on the bathroom tile
and had a crisis of confidence.

What was I doing,
and who was I to say
that someday,
someday —

Didn’t I owe myself more?
Owe my family more?

The pills spun in the sink,
spinning their sugar-shells away,
twisting and twirling,
empty wholes waiting
like ballerinas in the wings,
while I sat there
yearning to be —

Okay would’ve been good enough for me.

Black-and-white balcony shadows
beckoned, high tide waters
foaming at the mouth of Elysium.
I knocked my head against the wall
and, dreaming, began to fall
into a world of blotchy
purple and blue,
far, far away
from you.

waves on a beach
ballerinas in the wings, a line from "Crisis of Confidence"
a skinny woman

Poet’s Notes

The content of this poem is a little dark, though it might not appear that way at first sight. This isn’t your average “crisis of confidence.”

Let me know what you thought about this poem in the comments! I’d love to hear your voice. If you enjoyed this poem, you might also enjoy my poem “Like a Flame.”

And thank you for reading! If you enjoyed this poem, I’d really appreciate if you left me a tip on Ko-fi so I can keep creating as much as possible for you.

a man with flowers growing out of his eyes

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